I’m a thinker. And I’ve been thinking a lot on freedom. And judgement. I’ve seen so much judgement lately. Judgement is inherent. We judge. We have to because we are humans and every day, we have to make choices. Making choices means judging.
But here’s the catch….we can judge actions without judging people. I can think, “Hmmm…it’s best if my kids go to bed at 9pm and get up at 8am,” without judging the mom who lets her kids stay up all night (um, me!). We can bottle feed or breastfeed without judging another mama for doing the opposite.
Our family has a bit of a non-traditional lifestyle and I’ve been judged and slammed on all of these things:
- We homeschool. Actually, we unschool. Basically, life is learning. We don’t use a curriculum. Our kids follow their own interests and passions. I’ve been told that I’m a crappy mom over that one. More than once.
- Our kids have been in and out of bars throughout their lives (they are 13 and 17 now). My husband is in a band and we take our kids with us. They’ve seen a lot of drunk people and probably a couple of bar fights. Because of this, alcohol has zero appeal to them. But good moms don’t drag their kids around in bars. Yeah, right.
- I’m involved in network marketing. Oh, the judgment on this one is heavy. Online, people make jabs and digs. Sometimes in person, too, but it’s much easier to slam someone online. I love what I do. I’m proud of it. I’m good at it. I’m successful and retired my husband 3 years ago. Once, someone told me that I didn’t make an “honest living.” It’s not like the mafia or something. But the judgement is fierce. And it’s ugly
- I’m a believer and follow Jesus. Some people just wait and watch for believers to screw up so they can play the hypocrite card. Ouch!
Y’all, this is what FREEDOM looks like.
We can educate our kids however we see fit. We can pursue our dreams and passions. We can choose our religion and political preferences. We can vote differently. We can parent differently.
In our country, I can do my own thing. You can do your own thing. And we can both be right. In fact, sometimes no one is right. It just is.
We also have the FREEDOM to judge. Yup, we sure do. But judging only hurts us. Your judgement of ME says very little about me. It says A LOT about you. And those times that I judge, I need to do some serious self-reflection because usually, my own junk is surfacing.
Enough rambling. Let’s just try to be cool people, o.k.?